A Rolling Ball

I was given this gift of the blog at Christmas from my daughter, Janet... and I remember how hard she worked and how excited she was when she was teaching me how to use it.. and when I wrote my first blog.. that was months ago....I have done nothing since... .and one day Janet gave up on me and called me "looser"..

I also recall my sweet 87 year old sister saying on the phone one night.. "I love the sound of your voice."....and I replied "So do I Val..".... so you would think that i would grag this opportunity to " hear my voice..." what an ego trip.. just to write and go on and on ...

But I din't .. and I wonder why..

I remember learning long ago the message that a rolling ball picks up momnetum...if you feel overwhelmed or anxious.. or just not sure what to do in a situatiuon.,. pick up the perverbial ball and start the rolling.. and amazingly before you know it you are on a roll..if you are trying to compose something on your computer.. and you are drawing a blank.. .. just start typing your name..or the day of the week.. and presto.. the work is on its way..

So here I am and as I type I wonder again what was my problem...besides writing I love to analyze.. and it ocurred to me that another message I learned long ago.. may have been the reason.. it has to do with the " shoulds " in life...somehow whenever we hear the word " should" it almost sounds like a parent tape.. a rule.. a command.. almost a finger ponting pressure trying to control my moves and behavior....

So instead of "should" I can replace that word with "want".. and then it becomes self motivated and believe it or not.. you are more eager to perform an act if you feel that it is something you "want" to do....human nature.. .add to that the word "need" ..there are actually a few real needs in the world.. food.. shelter... water.. air.. touching..so when you are on the phone chatting with a friend and you know the time is running out and you have a project to do or dinner to cook..you do not " need" to get off of the phone.. you "want " to get off of the phone because you do not want the outcome if you stay on the phone.... think about it..you do not want the client angry with you if you do not have the work ready for the meeting.. you do not want the kids rushing in the door starving and carrying on and no dinner ready....with homework etc...

Maybe I felt the "should" aspect of this blog..and the possible guilt and performance aspect instead of the "want"..and I finally decided that I really want to do it.. so here I am..

Now I also have to assure all of you who doubt this message.. .. I have nothing against rules , parents, integrity, morality, values and ethics.. ..(where the " shoulds " in life often are quoted) no finger pointing my way please.. I believe in the red street light .. and the stop sign.. they are there to prevent accidents.. and chaos in the streets.. the difference is that I "want" to obey them.. because I want the positive outcome.. order and no accidents..

And I want to tell Janet that I finally got to this blog and I am not a "looser ...I did it ..I did it.. see the rolling ball thing.. and I love her for knowing how much I would love this gift..

And as much as I love to hear my own voice.. I would love to hear yours..... so join in and give me your feedback ...I "want" to hear from you.. I hope that you "want " to respond but you do not "need" to...

Have a good day.. by the way it is up to you to make it a good day.. OMG... there she goes again,..that is a whole other blog.. you "want" to sign off..